Adoption and Loss

All orphaned children have experienced traumatic loss on some level. When dealing with and trying to understand loss, it is essential for parents and caregivers of kids from “hard places” (i.e., kids who have experienced neglect, abuse, trauma) to understand the psycho-social issues associated with the loss of a parent or caregiver. It is common for kids who have experienced traumatic loss to be sad and confused. Kids may be angry. They may hit, kick, and bite. Kids from “hard places” may lie, not listen and may have problems learning. They may scream, and they might run away. Kids from “hard places” might attempt to harm caregivers, parents, siblings, or themselves. All of these emotions and behaviors will be at a level far more intense than what is expected from normal child development. And, all of these emotions and behaviors will manifest themselves differently in different children, at different ages and stages. Parents must be prepared for these realities. Parents must be informed.